WAY TO GO! THE REAL WORLD In a perfect soccer world, teammates would all love and support each other, everyone would have the talent and mentality to represent their country on its national team, and the ball would always roll their way. Our young readers are writing to tell us that sometimes their soccer experiences are confusing and less than perfect. They find it overwhelming to work through change, face the unknown, and still stay motivated. For this issue's "WAY TO GO," I answer two letters from readers who are both dealing with difficulties encountered in the U.S. Olympic Development Program environment, but their challenges are universal to players at every level of soccer. MY TEAM IS FALLING APART! Hi Women's Soccer World, I LOVE soccer! I'm 12, and on a brand new team. The girls on this team are from an ODP pool team that I was on, and the ODP assistant coach put us together and made us a "state traveling team." I'm thrilled that I'm on an Under-13 STATE TRAVELING TEAM!!! But we went to a team camp and the coach we ended up with was a real JERK! After only two practices together, there is a lot of arguing on our team. We're all on club teams and 11 of the girls are from the same club team. These girls treat everyone on the team who is not on their club team like CRAP, and we don't know what to do. Some are thinking of quitting. "Are you nuts?" I yelled at them. "It's not every day you're good enough to be on a state travelling team!" What can I do about my falling apart team? Please e-mail me ASAP. Our third practice is tomorrow... SHASTA: Congratulations on making the ODP pool and a state traveling team. You are right, it's a wonderful opportunity not to be wasted, and it's great that you are reaching out to help the team work together. Pulling this team together is a big job. It's important for you to know that you cannot "change" the other girls - how they feel about or treat girls from other club teams, whether they take full advantage of being on this traveling team, etc. - but you can set an example for others and lead the way for other girls on the team who want peace, unity and to play soccer. You are going to have to take the "high road." Refuse to engage in any kind of gossip or negative exchanges with ANY of the girls. You can 1) politely change the subject.....if that doesn't work.....2) say you don't want to talk negatively about the team or anyone on it...and if that doesn't do it....3) excuse yourself and walk away. You're there to play soccer and have fun, so do it! It's the Thumper rule: "If you don't say something nice, don't say anything at all." Begin building a relationship with ALL the girls: Greet everyone and always use their name when you greet them. "Hi Sherry!" "How's it going, Rachel!" Ask a girl from a different club team to pass the ball with you during warm-ups. If she says "no" ask someone else from her club team. If they all say "no," don't give up - ask again and again. Make it a goal to compliment each girl one time during practice. Everyone has something wonderful about them. It could be about soccer---"Great pass!" "Way to hustle!" "Wonderful cross!"---or something personal---"I love your socks!" "I like the way you fix your hair!" "You have a great laugh!" Spend a little time with each teammate at first and gradually increase that time. Hang out with everyone even if they act like they don't want you around. I know that doing this with people who have not been very nice to you is hard, and some of them will continue to be mean and to cause trouble...there are always a few people like that in everything you do. But, meet EVERYONE with kindness....a smile, a hello, and a kind word. Your team needs someone who is mature enough to do that right now. That someone is YOU! I DIDN'T MAKE THE TEAM Hi Women's Soccer World, I just got back from the ODP Regional Trials and didn't make the team. I was down to the last nitty gritty and I didn't get picked. Since I didn't get picked, does that mean I won't get anywhere? SHASTA: To answer your question, I contacted Steve Holeman, Women's Head Coach at the University of Mississippi and Region III Staff Coach. COACH HOLEMAN: As an ODP Regional Staff Coach, we are faced with a challenge of selecting a pool of players from a large array of talent. The most difficult part of this selection process is naming the last group of players to the pool. If you were on the "bubble" but just missed making the pool, then I would venture to say you are an extremely talented player. Not being named to the regional pool definitely does not classify you as someone who "won't get anywhere." As a matter of fact, many players who are not identified for the pool go on to have very successful college careers. If you have the desire and are committed to improving your game, then college scholarships are in the near future. It sounds like you have all the tools to be very successful. Be your best, and you will go far. SHASTA: Unfortunately for many girls, success at ODP is strictly defined by the outcome---whether one is chosen to go on to the next level. Here are some other ways to measure "success" at the ODP trials or any other try-out situation: No regrets, play your best! Strive to have no regrets like "I could have played harder" or "I could have been more focused." Maintaining a positive attitude and giving all your effort on the field is the epitome of true success. ***Take full advantage of the learning opportunities. You will be introduced to different systems, styles and tactics, as well as playing positions you may have never played before in the club environment. Be open to change and expand your versatility as a player. Make new friends. ODP is all about interacting with new people whether from another club team within your state or from a different state. Make it a point to say "hi" and introduce yourself to at least one new person each day. ODP exposes you to college coaches. It's not just about them "looking" at you, you need to be "looking" at them. Do they carry out their ODP responsibilities professionally and with enthusiasm? How do they encourage a player?...correct a player? Are their training sessions well-organized, pertinent, and demanding, yet enjoyable? What kind of rapport do they have with the players on the state team they are training and evaluating? Talk to these players. Are their evaluations from their regional coach all positive, all negative or a good balanced assessment with specific suggestions for areas of improvement? ODP is a great opportunity to get a closer look at the college coaches in your region and determine which ones would be a good fit for you! I wasn't selected to the Regional Pool, but I came away from the experience with many new friends and an invitation to guest play with a club team in some major tournaments. I learned a new position and over the course of my ODP experience - state practices, the sub-regional tournament, and regional camp - I now can play stopper very effectively. I added two coaches to my list of possible "good fits" for the future. ODP has many destinations, not just one. It has more to offer you than just making the regional pool. Open yourself up to the possibilities and you will have a more positive, successful experience next year. Good luck! Shasta © Women's Soccer World September/October 1998	Shasta's Articles Trends The Real World The "Parent Trap" Going The Distance Three Wishes Summer! 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